The Pi Man Election Desk is ready to call the 2020 Pie of the Year winner.

There will be no recount. No court challenges. This contest is over. The 2020 Pie of the Year winner with an 8.75 average score. 

The Pear, Fig and Walnut Pie.

Type: Homemade

Baker: Dakota Jacobs 

Ingredients Acquired:  Belmont Market, Wakefield, RI

Occasion:  Thanksgiving

2020 Pie of the Year Nominee #3: The Pear, Fig & Walnut

The Pear, Fig & Walnut (Judging Note. All scoring below is based on a 10-point grading scale, with one being the lowest.)  November 2020. 

Crust Dynamic. Buttery Goodness. Sturdy but still thin, so not doughy. The coloring pattern of the crust was interesting - burnt color, but no burnt flavor, crystalized but not sugary. Pi Man Rating: 9 

 

Dynamics of the Interior. D'anjou pears, dried figs and crushed walnuts.  Very ample proportions. The pears played well, not mushy but not as firm as apples. I guess the figs play a roll in keeping the pie consistent and keeps the pears from deteriorating into pear sauce . The walnuts gave its customary crunch. Pi Man Rating: 8.5

Appearance.  Odd. Like the top of the Millennium Falcon from Star Wars.  Circles. Lines. I liked it.  Pi Man Rating: 8.5

Imagination.  Never had a pear pie in my life.  A common fruit, yet it escapes the normal pie rotation.  Here's to uncharted territory.  Pi Man Rating: 9

Pi Man Summary.  This was unique and tasty pie.  Pi Man Final Score:  8.75

Pie Nominee of the Year #2: The Crazy Crust Apple and Walnut.

Crazy Crust Apple and Walnut Pie. (Judging Note. All scoring below is based on a 10-point grading scale, with one being the lowest.). September 2020. 

Crust Dynamic. Yowza!  This crust was light, crispy, sugary. It was a dessert in a dessert. If anything, maybe there was too much sugar in/on the crust which made it taste a little like a kid's breakfast cereal.  I love crisscross crust patterns. This crust was wicked.  Pi Man Rating: 9

Dynamics of the Interior.   For some reason, it was skimpy on the apples. Who makes a crust this wicked and then goes skimpy on apples?  Sad turn of events.  The baker did use Granny Smith apples though, which is a great choice.  Pi Man Rating: 7

Appearance. Magnificent. Look at it??  Pi Man Rating: 10

Imagination.  Apples and Walnuts. Not exactly exploring strange new lands. Tried and true, but could have used a third ingredient (caramel?)   Pi Man Rating: 7

Pi Man Summary.  I was wired after eating this pie. If only it had more apples. It may have approached Hall of Fame status. The crust was bonkers. Pi Man Final Score:  8.25 

 

2020 Pie of Year Nominee #1: The Peach Praline.

The Peach Praline. (Judging Note. All scoring below is based on a 10-point grading scale, with one being the lowest.)  October 2020. 

Crust Dynamic. Well, there was a lot of crust, but it was flimsy. Peach filling tumbled out of the pie once it was cut. The crust itself was on the doughy side. The taste was fine, little buttery and fit in well with the pie interior. Pi Man Rating: 7

Dynamics of the Interior. Oh mama. Peach and praline make a nice texture combination, sort of like apple and walnuts, but with the softer peach filling just melting in your mouth. Sweet. Sticky. This is a great breakfast pie, dessert pie or watching football pie. This pie was generous as well.  Pi Man Rating: 9

Appearance. The yellow of the peach gives the pie appearance some extra credit once it is cut. Before cutting, the praline makes a weird pattern on the crust, like coffee beans or bird droppings (okay, maybe that is a bit rough). Pi Man Rating: 7

Imagination.  This pie spoke to me.  At this stage in my debauched pie life, I can usually drag pie consumption out over 3 or 4 days. This one was gone in 24 hours.  Pi Man Rating: 8

Pi Man Summary.  It burst into my home like a long lost friend on a rainy autumn afternoon. Extra consideration for being a great breakfast pie.  Pi Man Final Score:  7.8

2020 Pi Man of the Year Pie Nominees

 "Here ye, hear ye. By proclamation of Pi Man, we will be announcing this week the 2020 nominees for Pie of the Year.  Signed, the editorial staff of Pie, Coffee and Conversation. "

The pies will be judged on:

(1) Crust Dynamic, including texture, stability, and taste.

(2) Dynamic of the Interior, including freshness, texture and taste. 

(3) Appearance, both before and after slicing.

(4) Imagination, including ingredient creativity, presentation, and the sheer joy the pie creates.

All are worthy. Only one can win. There is no second place.”

Thanksgiving 2020: Pear, Fig and Walnut Pie. Pi Man Approved.

Some of you may recall Pi Man's despair after Thanksgiving 2019 (see blog post from November 29, 2019: The Pie Side of Hell). Missing pies, Forgotten pies.  2019 was the Year of Pie Regret. I'm happy to report Thanksgiving 2020 was better.

A whole lot better.

This year Little Pi Man (aka my baking son) delivered a Pear/Fig/Walnut Pie. When it comes to pies, I show no favoritism. The pie gods do not allow it. But this year, the off-spring delivered a strong contender for Pi Man's Pie of the Year Award.  Amazing texture combination with the d'anjou pears, figs and walnuts. Stellar crust.  Ample proportions. 

Watch out for Pi Man's Pie of the Year nominees in early December, by the way, with the winner being announced on New Year's Eve (what else do I got to do?) 

Here are some of the pie-making pictures. I really only like eating pie 

and could give a fig's ass about the process (get it...because it was a fig pie.) But can't say Pi Man doesn't read his email. 

 

Pie for Breakfast

 

For those misfortunates who listen to me yap about pie, you know my ‘pie for breakfast” view. My silent prayer for Breakfast Freedom. The Cake Conspiracy has completely absorbed American Breakfast.  Disguising cake surrogates like pancakes, waffles, and French toast as the only choice for a breakfast blowout at your local Golden Spoon, we earnest Americans aren’t even aware that we could be ordering a pumpkin pie with those scrambled eggs.  Look, I know what you are saying. Pi Man, we are as upset as you are. We’ve been tricked by The Cake Conspiracy (the Conspiracy, we assume, being a loose web of pie bakery conglomerates, birthday candle manufacturers and the laboratory which created frosting in a can). We’ve been fooled into believing it is a venial sin to have eggs, bacon, and banana cream pie on our breakfast table.  Sure, there are some brave souls that practice Breakfast Freedom at home and breakout the Fruits of the Forest Pie with the corn flakes. But at a local diner?  In front of your neighbors, their children, maybe even your mother?

Breaks my heart to talk this way about Pie for Breakfast. But truth is written by the victor and The Cake Conspiracy has the upper hand these dark days. But once in a while, a beacon shines on the hill. You know there is still a spark of rebellion.

Today, while mindlessly surfing pie-related news, I found located in Pittsburgh PA a breakfast place called Pie for Breakfast.  Open 7 days a week, it serves up savory and fruit pies with your steak and eggs, biscuit, and gravy.  You can even cross the line and get a fruit pie with your panCAKES.  Heartwarming stuff. I can not wait to try it out.

Does anyone know of this place?  Are there any firsthand reviews?   It’s an 8.5 hour drive for me but it is on my short list.

Pi Man’s October Shout Out for Profiles in Breakfast Courage:

Pie for Breakfast (Pittsburgh PA)

 https://pieforbreakfastpittsburgh.com/index.html

I Like Pie Update: News from Pie Front Line.

Pi Man has a secret Pie Crush.

I live 2,9533 miles from the I Like Pie bakeshop in Claremont,CA. A 44 hour drive via Google Maps. They do not know who I am. No matter, they have stolen my heart with an outrageous contribution to sweet and savory pie cuisine. 

I am thrilled to report I Like Pie is open during the Plague. They are making people happy with curbside pickup. 

Thanks to GB for his intrepid reporting. 

Pie Dementia. I don't remember eating this pie but I have a picture of it on my phone.

Dissociative identity disorder?  Or just too much pie?

I wish I remembered. It looks like a good apple pie. 

Yup. McDonald's Famous Hot Apple Pie

These are challenging times. Pi Man is not exempt.

The coffee houses and the dessert shops are shuttered. The blessing to sit with a friend and enjoy a slice of pie has been curtailed. Like many of us, I have been driven to nostalgia for comfort. Driven way back. To the humble beginnings of Pi Man's journey.

I kissed a McDonald's Hot Apple Pie this week. And I liked it.

It's been decades since I indulged in Mickey D's contribution to pie-time cuisine. Not since Pi Man's 4-20 days maybe. But I digress. Before I jump into the Experience, let me share some facts.

• The original McDonald's Hot Apple Pie debuted in 1960 in Knoxville TN.  So giving props where props are due - this thing has outlived about 100 other items on that menu which have come and gone over the years.
• In other countries, fruit pie tastes run wild. McDonald's offers pineapple pies in Thailand and banana pies in Philippines. 
• All the apples that give their life for your pie-filling are American born and bred! 

The Experience

COVID lock-down meant this was a drive-thru experience. To ensure instant gratification, I needed to eat the pie in the parking lot. I was bit concerned, because I remember the pie of my youth burning the shit out of my mouth.  I was also concerned because I did not see my Pie on the drive-thru menu but upon asking the helpful Mickey D associate, I was informed that it indeed still existed at 99 cents!

Upon receiving the pie and pulling over to eat it,  I was shocked!

• It is not fried anymore. It has not been fried since 1992 or something like that. It is baked. Damn, if I knew that I wouldn't have brought my cholesterol medication with me. 
• It has lattice on the crust. Which is like when I put nice rims on my 1976 Ford Pinto in college. Solid effort to impress but really, not so  much.

I bit into it. Carefully, expecting it to be scorching hot. It was not.  It was room temperature plus 2 degrees. Very nice actually.  

The verdict?  It isn't the worse pie I've had, believe it or not. It is better than some lame ass store pies. It may be better than a couple homemade pies people have shoved under my nose in the past decade too.

The sad part. Well, there are a lot of sad parts, but the saddest is a grown man eating a pie by himself in a parking lot. That is not exactly what Pi Man and the Pie, Coffee and Conversation blog is all about. But you know, desperate times... 

Pi Man signing out and wishing everyone safety and sanity! 

I got me a bout of "Missing My Coffee House" blues.

Dear Closed Coffee House.  

Never again will I take you for granted.  
Never again will I assume you are always available, waiting with anticipation for my arrival.
Never again will I bad mouth you when all the good tables are taken by people not buying anything.
Never again will I act like a 6 year old when the Chocolate Mint Decaf is gone for the day.
Never again will make a scene when the dude with the bad music taste plays an extended Oingo-Boingo play list. 
Please come back.  

I miss you.  I need you.

Peddler Universe and Coffee House Culture

Wake up Coffee House Owners.  There is a group who spend a lot of money. The Passing-Through-Town Peddlers. And we have special needs.

Salespeople are a unique constituency of the Coffeehouse Culture.  We roam. Yeah, we may have a “home-office” coffeehouse like every other remote worker,  but we spend a whole lot of time on the road, which means we are short term guests in foreign shops. We pop into a coffeehouse wherever we are. We get done whatever needs to be done. Then we disappear.  I visit 75 different coffee shops a year in 15 cities. I spend money in all of them. I go back to the good shops. I never return to the lame ones.  It is easy to ignore me because you do not see me much – but I am part of a large guild of traveling coffee-drinkers. There are lots of us, entering everyday a new coffeehouse in a new city.  We are not looking for the sociability and community elements of Coffeehouse Culture. We are looking for a corner with table space and accessible Internet. We buy coffee (caffeine) and pastry (sugar) because we are stressed-out maniacs. We do this all the time, repeatedly, all day.  We just want space – can’t you keep a reserved “peddler” section that has a one-hour time limit?  Can you make easy to figure out the WiFi password (or better yet, just let people connect?) A lot of us have MiFi devices…but we forget them.  And for my sake…can’t you have a nice slice of apple pie available to purchase?  Bad bagels and stale coffeecakes just don’t do it.

Happy New Year! Are you ready to break that resolution yet?

Williamsburg Brooklyn,  home of the hip, the young and the cool.
Where old men tourists wear skinny jeans and look like a tool.

- Pi Man (probably wearing skinny jeans)

People, I'm back from holiday break. Did you miss the Pi Man?  I had some business to conduct. I had some quality family time to spend. But rest assured, it that did not slow down my pursuit of Pie, Coffee and Conversation.

Over Xmas, I was in Brooklyn NYC.  It allowed me to sample some local fare and engage in some local discussion.  Brooklyn is a big place, so excuse any generality; but if you are unfamiliar with the Williamsburg neighborhood, this is what you need to know:

(1) There is a coffee shop for every single person who lives there.
(2) It borders to the north with the Greenpoint neighborhood. which is a large Polish community now infused with Modern Hipster.  Greenpoint only has a coffee shop for every 3 people, but that shop will be within 500 yards of a place that sells beef tripe soup.

(3) 5 star commitment to the Sweet Tooth.  From the basic to the ethnic to the wildly unusual, you will find it here. I indulged in some Makowiec ( poppy seed cake) on Christmas Day (before the dinner trip to Chinatown, but that Cantonese-inspired holiday delight is another blog topic).

Some amazing sweet spots in Williamsburg -   Bedford Baking Studio (Turkish influenced) and Tomoko (Japanese-French desert fusion). 
I sliced up some pie at Martha's Country Bakery, which is a crazy pie shop with a few locations in Queens and Brooklyn.  Serious cream pies to eat in or take out.  Highly encourage stopping by the location on Bedford Street if you are looking for a sugar high.